Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Why Do I Need Money

Loot, regardless the form and the source of its origin is a treasured commodity. People usually complain about big numbers if the numbers are about hip size, waist, or weight. Fortunately for loot, bigger is most definitely better. It is one of the few phenomenons in this world that one can not have enough of! Let's pick an everyday mortal and ask if he/she has money. I think I have a better chance shedding 20 kilos than that person giving a yes to that question! Loot requires respect and a whole lot of it! One would speculate, looking at the seemingly neutral bills and coins that its relatively harmless and is ready to execute whatever you demand. This is wrong! As far as loot is concerned, going from hero to zero is not decided on how many zeros are added where, but WHO adds how many zeros where.

According to social norms, the one possessing loot is a respected person. Now I see most of you jumping up and down vehemently trying to deny this statement. This denial is usually accompanied by philosophical outbursts such as "it is not money, it is the virtues that value", "people with money are usually morons and thieves" etc. Sadly for us, we are not governed by philosophy. One fine thing to note however is, neither is money! :)

So, why do I need money?

I need money to be a geek.

Sure! To travel all over the world, attending this meeting, that convention, this presentation, that workshop, start a geeky business, spread the geeky love... the list is endless. Exhibiting geeky grandeur is a favorable trait, for many of us can not do that. I don't think geeks will rule, but I am sure with the truckload of money they own (doing similar geeky things), they are pretty close to ruling at some point in future.

I need money to be fun(ny).

Entertaining people is hard work. The worst is entertaining old people. I think with age, like the other 206 bones we possess, the fun(ny) bone too turns brittle! Entertaining old folk, therefore is a costly adventure, which usually returns more complains than complements. It is an accepted fact that fun people spend to remain fun. Funny people on the other hand earn to remain funny!

I need money to be rich

Loot brings riches. Unfortunately, the inflow of loot paves way to unthinkable out flows. Such is the bizarre properties of loot! It takes more than luck to be rich and remain rich. What do you need? More loot.

I need money to be in debt

There is this friend of mine, who earns a salary, pays the debtors and still manages to be in debt. It is amazing how that person does that, and that specimen certainly is study-worthy. One hopes, one day that person will find the balance of loot as the Avatar found the balance of the four elements and defeated Fire Lord Ozai.

Come the day loot loses this talent to make us want to be one thing and the opposite of that thing at the same time, we will all lose interest, literally. Regardless, its loose ends, I love loot. I am not sure loot loves me, because it never seems to stick with me. Despite the rejection, my door is always open... for loot!